Humor Satire

Apocalipstick by Sue Margolis

By Sue Margolis

From the writer who introduced you Spin Cycle and Neurotica comes a hilarious new novel approximately falling in love, hating your activity, and getting what you will want out of life---without ever mussing your lipstick!When it involves males, attractiveness columnist Rebecca fantastic continuously appears at the scruffy finish of the mascara wand. yet all that alterations the morning she meets Max Stoddart, her new colleague on the day-by-day forefront. together with his upscale swimsuit, Hugh furnish hair, and obscenely horny attractiveness, he’s a unmarried woman’s dream come precise. eventually, her grandmother can cease browsing the web for eligible Jewish men. yet is Max the seize of the decade---or only a significant babe magnet? in the meantime, Rebecca’s outdated highschool nemesis has resurfaced, a former blond bombshell known as Lipstick who's now engaged to Rebecca’s widowed dad. And it’s goodbye to articles on toe cleavage whilst a sizzling tip sweeps Rebecca to the heart of the Paris cosmetics global, the place a miracle anti-wrinkle cream is set to be introduced. that's, until eventually she blows the whistle on a scandal that may set the sweetness business---and the way forward for international peace---reeling. Will Rebecca win the recognition---not to say the Pulitzer---she yearns for...and get the guy of her desires? remain tuned.

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A matching PalmPilot lay to one side, a brand-new yellow legal pad to the other. Lying across this, bisecting it diagonally into two precisely equal halves, was a painfully fashionable Plume de Ma Tante fountain pen. Sitting at a safe distance was a Starbucks cappuccino. “What the . . ” She stood frowning and looking for Snow to ask what was going on. But she’d disappeared. ” she asked nobody in particular. The three or four people sitting close by staring into their screens looked up briefly to smile and shake their heads.

Becks, listen. I haven’t bought Bagpuss. I’ve got it. ” “What? ” “I don’t know. I never tried. But if I could, I wouldn’t be able to do it now. And I know Ed’s noticed. Why else would we have only done it twice since the baby? The second time it took him ages to get a hard-on. He doesn’t fancy me anymore. ” “Oh, come on,” Rebecca soothed, “Ed’s crazy about you. Always has been. He’s not going to go off you simply because you’ve gained a millimeter or two in the pussy department. You’ve got a new baby.

I don’t want to upset him. I mean maybe I could learn to live with being Mrs. ” Rebecca shook her head. Snow was a kind, sweet girl, but she allowed people to walk all over her—especially Lucretia. As she reached her desk, Rebecca did a cartoon double take. All her stuff had gone. Her computer, her notebook, her ceramic arse full of Biros and emery boards, the mass of freebie cosmetic samples sent in by publicists desperate for publicity, not to mention three pairs of windup walking sushi, had all vanished.

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