Today I’m probably going to be out most of the day. In a little bit, I’m getting picked up to go to Spring, TX. Apparently it’s a shopping paradise. I’m not thrilled. I’m actually most looking forward to going to the tea room for lunch. I like tea rooms, they are nice and simple and they don’t give you huge plates of food. But anyways, it’s going to be super hard to keep the monster in me in check when mom is going to be splurging left right and center, like she has been since she landed. It’s actually getting a bit frustrating. I know that it’s not my business technically, but I don’t want to see her staying in the hole that she’s in, and eventually getting deeper into it. Mom has a personality where she turns to inanimate things for comfort and that’s what she’s been doing lately with food and … well, stuff. She actually said yesterday that nothing but shopping was any fun. There were so many things that I wanted to do over the weeks that just never got an opportunity. The way I see it, gatherings and parties and events create memories and those are worthwhile, but shopping generally just creates more junk. I really wanted to have a board game night or go away to San Antonio, but it just didn’t happen. I do know that I’m going to start a tradition in my own family, me and Mike and our future spawn, to spend one night a week having an inexpensive activity as a family. I never had family time growing up, and now it’s very precious. Sure I spent a lot of time playing with toys (and I certainly had a few) but those aren’t really great memories. I had a decent childhood as they go, I wasn’t abused, I got most things I wanted but not all, my parents loved me, and I had a couple friends at school. The only thing I really struggled with was relationships, and they may be a byproduct of all the time that I spent alone. Anyways, I’m getting onto a totally different tangent here, but what I’m trying to say is that shopping is boring. I usually enjoy it, but after awhile it’s all the same. How can people go out shopping every day? When do you get the chance to enjoy the stuff you bought? If you’re not taking the time to enjoy it, what’s the point? I’ve always wanted to live a comfortable life, but I think there’s a huge difference between comfortable and excessive.
At any rate, we’re going out to do the shopping thing, and then after this I’m so done for the next ten years. Shopping for the sake of shopping has lost it’s thrill for me. Yesterday mom wanted to go to the mall and I ended up just saying “NO!” I’m so tired of it. Hanging out with mom seriously drains me of all of my energy. I’ve been dead on my feet for the last two weeks. Last night, Mike and I skipped Bible Study because I literally couldn’t function. We ended up (well, I did anyways) taking a nap for a couple hours. And even now, I’m still exhausted. It doesn’t seem to matter how much sleep I get. This Saturday, Mike promised me cheesecake and a day of sitting home relaxing and I’m excited. I’ve been on supergo mode lately, and I’m just not used to it. Hopefully next week I’ll have the chance to relax and recuperate from all of this. I’m glad she doesn’t visit too often, I couldn’t handle it.