Now I don’t claim to be the Uber Goddess of In-Tar-Net Wisdom, but I have been around the block long enough to recognize what you should and should not do. Some of these tips have been passed down to me by Gurus of In-Tar-Net Wisdom, and some I learned through trial and error. And did I mention spam emails? Boy do you learn after that.
First off, it’s really important that you watch out what you sign up for. I signed up for a billion dinky little websites that only serve to give away my email addresses to spammers. After awhile I learned that if they don’t email you your password or validate your email, it’s best just to use a fake one. And sometimes they are quite obvious that they just want to spam on you. “For entrance to this wonderful quiz/article/game/whatever, you must click on at least one of our sponsors and fill in your email address below.” Uh-huh, you think I’m that slow?
And Hotmail is another issue entirely. You don’t even have to sign up for anything before they start spamming you. And it comes in droves! And don’t even get me started on those “Forwerd this to ten peopul or your account will get deleetud, duuuh..” emails. Honestly. Microsoft a) has access to everyone’s email address — remember those stupid monthly emails they send trying to get you to upgrade your account? — and you cannot block them (I tried), and b) if your account isn’t active at least once every 30 days (I think it’s 30, used to be 90 but I know they shortened it) then your account is declared inactive and your emails are erased. I feel like beating anyone who sends me those emails with a pointy stick.
And that brings us to a little diversion on chain emails. They are so retarded (pardon my un-P.C.-ness). Who cares about a “Hug War”? Or a “You are So Special” poem? When someone has sent it to 30 other people and you know some of them they barely even talk to (hey, you might even be one that they barely talk to), you know it’s just for show. And you get so many of the same ones over and over, filled with jpegs of Pooh and kittens and what-have-you. I don’t mind the quizzes, those are fun to answer, especially since it’s usually just good friends and not random strangers (who wants to tell random strangers personal things about yourself?), and every year or so the answers actually do change. Oh, and those “sign your name at the bottom and send it on so Little Susie can have a bone marrow transplant” — if that ever turns out in Little Susie getting surgery I would really like to know. What a bunch of signatures on the internet going to do when a girl needs a donator and money? (Hrm, this diversion could warrant it’s own blog, because… I could go on.. but I’ll continue.)
Recently there have been worms going around through msn, usually in a .pif file or something. What IS a .pif anyways? And why are people compelled to click on them? The first time I saw on, the file had already been cancelled when I returned, and I asked what it was. They said “DON’T ACCEPT!!!” since they had already found out the hard way that it was not a happy file. I keep seeing them pop up from time to time, sometimes from the same victims over and over. First of all, don’t accept something that you don’t have any idea what it is (wise words I did not conceive myself, I’ll admit), and when you know there’s a msn worm going around, don’t go clicker happy on files that are sketchy. In other words, don’t click accept on .pifs!
Lastly, people that download spyware on their computer. Those funky toolbars and all that junk, or those smileys for emails? I ran AdAware a few years ago after installing one of those things (grudgingly, there was some email templates I wanted and had to have the entire toolbar with it) and when it did the search, all the files that toolbar had installed showed up. I was like, “Oh my goodness, screw the templates,” and deleted the toolbar right then and there. I mean, you can get some really crazy spy/adware out there. Bonzai Buddy anyone?
So the moral of the story is: learn from past mistakes, don’t click on things when you don’t know what they are, and stay away from Hotmail. My work here is done. Oh and don’t send me any chain letters; I think I’ve managed to not get one for over a year – let’s keep it that way, shall we?
